I do not have a primary response to your concern, but I actually do suggest which you discuss these exact things with one another along with whatever else you may glean right here. It may lead to an interesting learning experience. Besides, each person is his / her very own source that is best of info. posted by moira at 1:20 PM on 14, 2006 february
Chinese culture is patriarchal. In a family group with sons and daughters, the pecking order is really as follows: Males so as of age descending, accompanied by females in an effort of age descending. Therefore a son that is 5-year-old their 35-year-old mother (in addition to daddy will allow both the caretaker and son know this). Young women can be in the bottom regarding the pecking order, plus they shall be produced aware of it constantly. In modern times (one young child policy) this has gotten a whole lot worse, while the phenomenon of spoiled sons that are rotten a name: Little Emperors.
Her moms and dads are unlikely to approve of her marrying A us. The “most-desired” wedding could be than her, Chinese, rich for her to marry a man 5-15 years older.
The financial possibility of her becoming a U.S. resident can make up I don’t know for you not being rich.
It is, needless to say, a stereotype. Hardly any other response to your enquiry is possible EXCEPT by describing stereotypes, since we do not know your gf’s moms and dads. published by jellicle at 1:58 PM on February 14, 2006
Example: In Asia, dating couple do not show love in public areas. In Thailand, the groom’s family members will pay a reverse-dowry into the bride’s family members. In Japan, partners give a lot of small presents to one another. Think about some info about how they are doing it in Asia?
There are many than a billion people in China, and many more into the Chinese diaspora. Asia itself is host to a huge selection of different cultures, each using its own rituals and customs. Saying “Chinese” is no more helpful than saying “European,” and even “Western.” posted by maxreax at 2:03 PM on February 14, 2006
One book we found interesting (although aimed more at teachers) ended up being Jean Brick, Asia: a handbook in intercultural communication. You should watch some current films from Asia aswell.
I am afraid I do not know much about courtship and dating in Asia. (I became created in Canada; my parents come from Singapore and Malaysia, perhaps not Asia.) But here is some assumptions you may trip over, from watching my moms and dads:
Relationship with a person’s parents / potential parents-in-law. Obedience is more crucial in Chinese families compared to Western families. Chinese culture is a lot more hierarchical much less egalitarian. Do not argue or talk right back.
Conforming to social rules is very important, much more so compared to the western.
Traditionally, general public displays of love are inappropriate. (this might have changed.)
Psychological and intimacy that is physical never to be used gently or casually. Chinese people look down upon Westerners for permitting their hormones operate their life, changing lovers the way they would alter clothing. Do not confirm the stereotype. (to not be nosy, but your earlier in the day question implies that you are currently married to another person. Even in the event that you have divorced, that’s a huge attack against you.)
jellicle: In a grouped family members with sons and daughters, the pecking order is really as follows: men in order of age descending, followed closely by females to be able of age descending. So a 5-year-old son outranks his 35-year-old mother (as well as the dad will allow both the caretaker and son know this).
This isn’t in line with my experience. From the things I’ve seen, the mother operates the household. Do not antagonize your girlfriend’s mother. published by russilwvong at 2:12 PM on 14, 2006 february
Might be worse; at the very least you’re not Japanese.
Seriously though, is she through the city or from countryside Sichuan? What’s she doing in Beijing? Are you currently in Beijing together with her? Are you her ticket away from Asia? How will you guys communicate? English? Chinese? Arms and feet? published by sour cream at 2:14 PM on February 14, 2006
Or “American” (at the least, without some ethnic-identifying hyphenated prefix). posted by Rash at 2:25 PM on 14, 2006 february
Saying “Chinese” is not any more helpful than saying “European,” and on occasion even “Western.”
Parenthetically: I do not understand why saying “Chinese” or “Western” isn’t helpful. The traditions are very different sufficient that there is some obvious distinctions, e.g. the more hierarchical and conformist nature of Chinese society (versus the necessity of egalitarianism and freedom that is individual the western), the greater casual Western method of dating). posted by russilwvong at 2:32 PM on 14, 2006 february
I’ll add some complete hearsay with this (told to me by Chinese in Shanghai). Whenever dating girls that are chinese be mindful saying “Everyone loves you”, as this is less a token of extreme affection and more an illustration of wedding. Just Take that while you will.